Wednesday, December 1, 2010

FEELING FRUSTRATED WITH TRACKING

I'm in that mood again.

A few months ago, I stopped tracking and tried to just eat what I thought I should eat, and I gained weight.  I decided to start tracking every bite of food that goes in my mouth again, and I've been doing that steadily for over two months now.

Today, I was watching the grandkids, and I was hit by this feeling of hunger coupled with depression that I could not eat anything except the food that was on my Fitday for the day.  I knew that, after lunch, I could not eat anything until I had my measly 4 ounces of roasted chicken thigh and serving of roasted zucchini.

The idea that I cannot just eat low carb food when I am hungry has me really frustrated today.  I was so frustrated that I threw out my Fitday for the rest of the day and ate about an ounce of pecans and a quarter of an ounce of cheese.  Now that my measly dinner is over, I want more food.  I am still hungry.  It's not just "wanting to eat" - it is real hunger.  I know the difference.

The problem is that I am a small person with a big appetite.  Even eating low carb, I can't eat a lot without gaining weight, and I want to eat a lot.

I'm not sure how I'll feel in the morning, but right now I want to stop tracking.  I just want to be a human being and eat food when I am hungry.

Is that too much to ask? I've been doing this now for almost 21 months, and you would think that my body would give me just a little cooperation...

I know I have low thyroid, and that may be why I have to eat so little, but still...

Just venting.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Rebecca,

    I imagine that it is VERY frustrating. When I decided to go low carb I did not have any definite plan in mind, except to keep the carbs low (20 carbs a day) and to add some back in slowly as I got closer to my desired weight. I also gain weight back pretty easily, although I don't have a thyroid issue.

    I find, that for myself, that instead of adding in carbs to an acceptable level, that I have been increasing my fat intake to take me beyond my calorie needs at this time. Fat satisfies me more than carbs do now, and I have slowly increased my 70% Lindt's chocolate bar to two squares, when initially I started with only one. I have increased my almond consumption to double what my starting amount had been. Also, my frozen blueberries amount is increasing (with additional heavy whipping cream). I used to have these treats only occasionally, but now find that I rely on them daily for my need for "comfort" foods.

    These small, dense, calorie increases and the Thanksgiving holiday have left me a good four pounds heavier. My holiday downfall is pie. Once I start eating pie I am done for until the pie is GONE! Even if that means I have to eat the whole darned thing until it is out of the house! Isn't that just crazy! I really did do it. I ate half of a pumpkin pie all by myself (in once day), so I know where my excess weight is coming from. I have to totally keep away from holiday sweet, because just one small serving sends me on a horrible bender. The after guilt is the absolute worst part of the whole ordeal.

    So, now,it is back to the basics for me and for my husband as well. No more double dipping on the comfort foods and definitely scaling back on the heavy whipping cream in my coffee.

    We have had quite a bit of snow here in Spokane. I think that the only reason I haven't gained even more poundage is because of all the shoveling I have been doing! HEY, maybe it's really muscle gain! LOL!

    Hang in there Rebecca and you will get past this slump.

    BTW, I would go nuts if I tracked everything I ate. However, my son and his wife finally moved out and they took their scale with them. I am one of those folks that really does need to weight daily, because it helps me each day to maintain some kind of control over what I put in my mouth. It is a tool that doesn't always work for everyone trying to loose weight, but works for me. I don't track what I eat at all, so I feel I do need this device.

    Take care Rebecca and have a wonderful December!

    Susan :>)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks, Susan, especially for being so honest about your own struggles and binges! Here's to a great December to both of us!

    Rebecca

    ReplyDelete